Come have a drink up at Ridgeway
Next to Classic Cuts
This is Newport
We ain't even got a Pizza Hut
Newport, down the M4 motorway
Famous for cheese and chips
Not Craig Bellamy
I catch you in the kitchen
And hey presto
I'm gonna melt you if you've never been to Chepstow
We had 6 nightclubs, but most closed down
Visit Newport, It's still a punk town
Get on the dancefloor
Mind the smoking ban
You won't see Charlotte Church, or Gavin Henson
Big up to Paul Flynn, not the Welsh Assembly
That's in Cardiff so it don't mean shit to me
Shirley Bassey, she's just like the Queen
Not from Newport, and probably never been
See me up Baileys on Tuesday for the quiz
But you won't know because the truth is...
You're not from Newport
You've probably never been there either,
I bet you a fiver
Your not from Newport
You've probably never heard of Pillgwennly,
Or been to Lliswerry
Your missus is a nutter
She's got curly teeth and she walks with a stutter
If you wanna know, about our little town
Pay money at the Severn Bridge and come on down
Ride around all day on the Newport bus
On the X15 and read the Argus
We got a sports village and a velodrome
6 drive through Mcdonalds for your journey home
From Newport Stadium to Rodney Parade
The Premier Inn where you probably stayed
Don't have a Debnhams but we got T K Maxx
Once you've had Port, you never goes backs
So if you want cheese on your chips
medieval ships, see mattresses in skips
Then comes take a trips
Visit John Frost square
You knows I'll see you there
But people might stare because
You're not from Newport
You've probably never been there either,
I bet you a fiver
You're not from Newport
You've probably never heard of Pillgwennly,
Or been to Lliswerry